Military COVID is the best thing for soldiers because the Army no longer requires Physical Readiness (PT) tests. Heard a rumor that the Army no longer conducts Physical Training (PT) tests for its soldiers as a result of military COVID? If true, that says a lot about the danger during this pandemic and wonder what the other branches of the Armed Forces are doing?

The Best Excuse to Skip PT… Or Is It?

When word got out that the Army might be suspending Physical Readiness Tests (PT) due to military COVID, it was like Christmas had come early for every soldier dreading that 6 a.m. formation. The mere rumor of no more PT tests had soldiers more excited than a Friday night with a four-day weekend ahead. “Wait, you mean I don’t have to sprint two miles in the freezing cold, do 80 push-ups, and suffer through sit-ups that make me question my life choices? Sign me up for this pandemic!”

Some soldiers were already fantasizing about the possibilities:

“Bro, I heard the Navy just gets to sit on boats and tan now.” “Yeah, and the Air Force? They’re probably doing virtual PT from home… with snacks.”

But the Army? We’d probably have a Zoom drill sergeant yelling at us to do push-ups while we secretly muted the screen and reached for our Pop-Tarts. If only.

The rumor mill went wild. Soldiers were debating what this meant for their daily lives: “If there’s no PT test, can I just eat pizza for breakfast now?” “I think this means beer is the new Gatorade. Gotta stay hydrated, right?”

Of course, the more “motivated” soldiers weren’t quite as thrilled. You know the ones—those guys who treat PT like it’s the Olympics, even if they’re just running laps around the motor pool. They were mourning the loss of their opportunity to flex in front of the platoon, clutching their protein shakes like they’d lost a best friend.

Meanwhile, the rest of us were living it up. Who cared if our uniforms were feeling a little snug? The military had a new enemy—COVID—and apparently, it had decided that running and push-ups weren’t part of the battle plan.

“Don’t worry,” one soldier joked, “Next thing you know, the Army’s gonna start issuing PT exemptions for ‘COVID belly.'”

All joking aside, it wasn’t long before someone had to rain on our parade, pointing out that the rumor was probably just that—a rumor. But for those glorious few days when it seemed like the Army might really suspend PT, we got a taste of what it would be like to live the good life, where the only test we had to pass was remembering to wear our masks… and maybe finding a snack that wasn’t a full meal.

Until then, it was back to the grind. But hey, at least we’ll always have those sweet, sweet pandemic dreams of skipping PT and embracing our inner couch potato.

The Frontlines

Check out the awesome selection of military-themed shirts, mugs, and posters at The Frontlines Shop—and don’t miss all the great stuff we’ve got on sale right now! Plus, believe it or not, some of the comics I whipped up during my 20-year military career have actually been published! These funny and sometimes edgy reflections are inspired by amazing mentors, great friends, and a deep appreciation for sarcasm. You can find them on Amazon The Frontlines

Popular Products