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Aviators and a Priest
Aviators and a Priest. The Coronavirus has upended the way we live and the things we do. More and more people are not even going to church on Sundays! However, now that bars and restaurants have reopened there is a surge on some bars and their two drinks for one specials. So where are you this Sunday? These aviators have found religion in a whole new way
Sunday Services: Aviator Style
It’s a Sunday morning, but instead of finding themselves in a church pew, a group of Army aviators is huddled in a dimly lit dive bar. The sign outside reads “2-for-1 All Day!” and inside, well, let’s just say the service is… spirited.
The coronavirus had changed a lot of things. People stopped shaking hands, started hoarding toilet paper, and, apparently, skipping Sunday church services for something a little stronger. For these aviators, the bar had become a new kind of sanctuary.
Captain Johnson raised his first drink, a whiskey sour, and announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Church of the Holy Two-for-One! Today’s sermon is brought to you by the good folks at Jack Daniels!”
“Can I get an amen!” someone shouted from the back, already three beers deep.
“You know,” Lieutenant Thompson chimed in, “Before the virus hit, my Sundays were spent repenting for the sins of the week. Now, I’m just getting ahead of next week’s mistakes!”
The group erupted in laughter. Sunday had taken on a whole new meaning—one where the hymns were sung off-key to ‘80s rock music and communion came in the form of tequila shots.
“Hey, isn’t this sacrilegious?” asked a fresh-faced junior pilot, his first time joining the squad’s unconventional Sunday ritual.
Captain Johnson smirked. “Son, if the Good Lord didn’t want us to find joy in a two-for-one special, He wouldn’t have let the bar reopen. It’s simple aviation math—two drinks for the price of one equals more time to reflect on life’s bigger questions… like, why we ever thought drinking during a Sunday morning flight was a good idea in the first place.”
The bartender, a grizzled Navy vet, wiped down the counter and chimed in. “As far as I’m concerned, y’all found religion. That first sip after lockdown? That’s like a baptism of the soul.”
The aviators nodded in agreement, raising their glasses again. It was hard to argue with wisdom like that.
“I dunno,” Lieutenant Thompson added, “The way I see it, bars are the perfect place to contemplate life. Plus, it’s a lot more comfortable than those wooden church benches. And let’s be real, communion wine’s got nothing on the Bloody Mary I’m holding right now.”
“So, where are we headed after this?” someone asked.
“Brunch,” Johnson said with a straight face. “That’s where we’ll do the real praying… that the hangover doesn’t hit until after Monday’s briefing.”
The bar echoed with laughter, and as the clock ticked past noon, the aviators toasted once more. Sure, their Sunday routine had shifted, but they had found religion in their own way—complete with holy spirits, some questionable hymns, and a communion that left them feeling spiritually buzzed.
As for church? Well, there’s always next Sunday. But for now, in the Church of the Holy Two-for-One, they were exactly where they needed to be.
The End
The Frontlines
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